I could have said “YES” but I didn’t

For how many days now, I’ve been haunted by different dreams, and sometimes I feel like I’m having nightmares. I often wake up in the middle of the night, hence the reason why I’m having a hard time getting up in the morning to go to work. Whenever I wake up, there’s always a question in my mind, “Is there a text message from Vi?” Yes, I’m always waiting for her text.

This morning, to the nth time, I woke up crying because I saw my burial. I got shot in the chest. And some more weird things happening.

This is the last conversation I remember.

Woman: There are a lot of people crying. Why are you crying? Are you not prepared?

Dawin: Just scared that I might not end up in heaven. Though if there is one reason why I should be happy leaving, it’s the thought that I will e able to be with the Lord already.

And then I heard the Lord suddenly, He asked me, “Gusto mo ba ngayon na?”

I answered “Hindi pa po.”

And then i woke up.

Now I wonder, what could have it been when I said “yes.”

I know there is a need for me to make my life worth living, and I need to do some fixing, repairs or whatever.

Ate Charm said I need to talk to my leader, and I need to ask God’s wisdom for the real message that he’s been telling me. I really don’t understand.

Another dream is me always finding coins in the sand in different places. The meaning? I’m being narcissistic, and I don’t wanna be. That’s why I wrote this blog, to remind me that Yes, I am a narcissistic person. Its time to be humble this time…

I love you Lord. I want honesty in every area of my life. I need guidance. I need love, I need comfort, I need a hug.

THANK YOU…

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