But even if it isn’t, I choose to be with her still. Even if she chooses to hurt me by not telling me that tiny insignificant,nonsense thing. According to her, it is so not big deal to talk about where she stayed last time she ran away from home,and I shouldn’t be asking about it anymore.
For some reasons,I remembered it again and so I asked her the second time. The third time. I got the same answers.
I don’t wanna ask her about it anymore just because I respect her. Period. But it doesn’t mean I’m not affected. It does hurt. But I need to get by.
I can’t remember when was the last time I wrote something on my journal.
I really can’t find time.
Last night I cried.
Because of Lou and Berly.
They apologized because they expected too much from me.
I don’t really need a lot of friends,but because I love them,I choose to stay with them. To be their supporter. Even if I get hurt in the process.
And speaking of hurt, Vi blogged about me being mean,and bad. About me hurting her. She accepts me for who I am and who I am not, but it affected me this much because I caused her too much pain already.
And I choose to CHANGE.
Soon I’ll be gone. Soon I’ll bid my goodbyes.
I am just hoping that I won’t be forgotten.
I have learned to love my students. And I have experienced crying because of them. I know somehow, I have touched their lives as they have touched mine.
And just this afternoon, our director told me that other blocks have been jealous because I’m not spending time with them the way I’m spending time with my advisory class.
And I know,I need to do something.
Two years. In two years, lots will change.
Another beginning comes as I start to end my another goodbyes.